Goodbye screwy week. I’m glad your (almost) over with. Take your “painless endoscopy” (ha) and your painful stomach full of gas and fearful panic from my enflamed chest and ribs with you. Shove off. And good riddance!
Just to celebrate, I’ve skipped my last Carafate dosage of the day so I could eat when I wanted and take my sleepy pills when I felt like it. 😛
I am still trying to make sense of how it is fair that I am paying my ex-husband’s business expenses because he ended up losing his business and filing chapter 7. I can see where I signed the paperwork, even though I was just going along with signing the paperwork because I figured I was silly for worrying the business would flop.
Turns out I was not silly. I should trust my instincts sometimes.
So until I am able to do something else, I am stuck paying money to the guy who loaned him money.
It could be worse. We are still able to pay bills. It could be a bigger amount. People could be coming by to take our stuff, but they’re not.
So why do I feel so awful about it? Because it is not fair. It’s not moral, even though it is legal.
I went to counseling for awhile. She told me I needed to get mad, and I am, but I’m not sure that helps.
Now, I am worried about my health. It must be the new thing to worry about. I had my heart checked out in stress test. It is fine. A doctor prescribed new meds, but I have days when I just don’t feel right… even though the numbers look alright. I just changed meds today, and I need to let them sink in. I need to trust my doctor is doing the right thing. If something happens, then I can always go to the ER, right? 🙂
Everything is going to be fine. I just need to relax a little and stop worrying. I can do it, because I’ve already survived a lot. I survived leaving a bad marriage and moving on. I survived living on my own with my daughter for awhile and filling out paperwork for my new husband to come to America. I survived people being pretty crappy to me and all sorts of things.
I flew all the way to England on my own, feeling some of the anxiety that I do now. I took a chance, and it was totally worth it.
I can do this, too. 🙂
Today I went to the cardiologist’s office to have a stress test. The period leading up to the test was stressful itself. Ian says it’s silly for it to be called a stress test when people are probably already stressed out about their health. I was in the office and a guy came out, just having had a stress test, apparently.
The receptionist said, “So you survived!” and he said, “Yes.” I had to laugh because I was next and I was just wondering how a stress test goes, but naturally didn’t ask. The test itself was not bad. I always feel a bit stressed out seeing a doctor, so my heart rate was up to 122. I only had to get up to 148 or something, based on my age, but managed to get up to the 170′s.
After they stopped the test, they had me lay down to do an ultrasound and then to cool down and let my blood pressure and heart rate return to normal. My heart felt like it was going to pound right out of my chest, but it calmed down within a few minutes.
My doctor’s office called to say everything was normal. I’m glad for that. I think I need to find a better way to manage stress, really.
Hard to believe the 2012 Olympics are drawing to a close. I just wanted to note a few of the athletes I’ve been avidly following with our abbreviated coverage:
Usain Bolt… one of the fastest men in the world 
Allison Raisman – impeccable floor exercise in Women’s Gymnastics
Rebecca Soni – Amazing swimmer
Chad Le Clos – Who just narrowly beat Michael Phelps in the Men’s 200m Butterfly Final – The look on his face said it all. 
Michael Phelps – Things started off not too great for him, but he may have one a few medals (22 medals, 18 of them gold)
The men’s Marathon was won by Stephen Kiprotich from Uganda to win Uganda’s first medal of London 2012 and their first gold medal since 1972.
Well, done London. What an amazing show! So proud of everyone who obviously put such hard effort into the 2012 Summer Olympics.
My birthday was wonderful. My parents called at 7:00am (easier for them to call, I bet, because it’s 2pm where they are) to sing the birthday song and chat a bit. It was good to hear from them.
Next, presents and spending time with Brit and Ian, including going to breakfast, watching “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen” (a wonderful movie) and a visit to the park downtown to watch the ducks and geese.
…followed by yummy salmon for dinner (courtesy of my husband) and some yummy birthday cake.
It was an awesome day! 🙂
I love the summer sports programs run through the local High School for middle 
school kids. It would be nicer to have them last a month, but I will still take 2 hours of learning and exercise for 4 days or a week and count it as extremely valuable.
Brit’s been nearly dragging me off to the gym at night. She loves to run on the treadmill, which I think is wonderful. I spend 10 minutes on a bike, and 10 minutes weightlifting, and that’s what I’m starting with.
I see my doctor again in January. I plan to be healthier and have lower cholesterol by then (and maybe some better blood pressure). 🙂 I hope Brit will be feeling much healthier by then, too.
Well, after 6.5 months of waiting, Ian finally has his shiny, new 10-year green card in-hand. So far, although the immigration process to the US has been a bit lengthy here and there, it’s not been horrid. “Yay! for the 10-year green card”. It’s always good being together. 🙂
I’ve not met a Five for Fighting song I didn’t love, but this one gets to me every time. It reminds me of my daughter and husband (and my extended family and friends) and how fast life goes. You can’t make every moment count, but it’s good to realize how important things are as you go.
Well, here it is “Finally Friday” and I’m not so sure I have snapped out of “I don’t want to talk to anyone because it’s Monday” mode, yet. But maybe the long holiday weekend will help.
I’ve been doing a bit of reading this week. In my email update from Alrighttit.com, I ran into this blog which is written by a woman who has unfortunately just passed away.
I think Ellie’s blog is hugely insightful. She was in her late 20’s and suffering from secondary breast cancer, talking about treatment and how she felt having to realize her life would be much more brief than she wanted or expected.
Reading through her posts was very enlightening because they were so thought-provoking, making you feel like, in the same situation, these were thoughts or questions you’d have also. Ellie was able to say exactly what was on her mind.. her fears, her treatment, her thoughts about her diagnosis, and how cancer is arbitrary and not a punishment for some act in your life that caused bad karma.
She left behind and a loving fiance. They were just a few weeks away from getting married.
It made me appreciate the value of being alive and able to read her words in the company of my husband and daughter, who mean so much to me.
On another note, we are still waiting for USCIS to approve Ian’s 10-year greencard. We’ve reached the 6-month anticipated approval date. Hopefully, there is some news soon, although it’s not a huge issue. He has a one-year extension that expires at the end of 揉她小豆豆揉到失禁h, so approval before then would be nice.
Have a good weekend, people.
.. for however long it lasts… Maybe just today. I like being able to share photos with people and hear about what people are doing. There are other things not-so-fun.
I signed out of Facebook on my iPhone. I have to say, things have been a bunch quieter.
Did I mention that I have a new iPhone? It’s company provided, so it’s free while I’m employed, which is nice. It’s interesting watching it correct things (to the wrong words) or not correct things. 🙂 Also, it’s fun dealing with intermittent slowness of updates, thanks to cell phone technology and availability.
I’ll catch up on photos later.
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